Genesis 29:13-30
13 As soon as Laban heard the news about Jacob, his sister’s son, he ran to meet him and embraced him and kissed him and brought him to his house. Jacob told Laban all these things, 14 and Laban said to him, “Surely you are my bone and my flesh!” And he stayed with him a month.
15 Then Laban said to Jacob, “Because you are my kinsman, should you therefore serve me for nothing? Tell me, what shall your wages be?” 16 Now Laban had two daughters. The name of the older was Leah, and the name of the younger was Rachel. 17 Leah’s eyes were weak, but Rachel was beautiful in form and appearance. 18 Jacob loved Rachel. And he said, “I will serve you seven years for your younger daughter Rachel.” 19 Laban said, “It is better that I give her to you than that I should give her to any other man; stay with me.” 20 So Jacob served seven years for Rachel, and they seemed to him but a few days because of the love he had for her.
21 Then Jacob said to Laban, “Give me my wife that I may go in to her, for my time is completed.” 22 So Laban gathered together all the people of the place and made a feast. 23 But in the evening he took his daughter Leah and brought her to Jacob, and he went in to her. 24 (Laban gave his female servant Zilpah to his daughter Leah to be her servant.) 25 And in the morning, behold, it was Leah! And Jacob said to Laban, “What is this you have done to me? Did I not serve with you for Rachel? Why then have you deceived me?” 26 Laban said, “It is not so done in our country, to give the younger before the firstborn. 27 Complete the week of this one, and we will give you the other also in return for serving me another seven years.” 28 Jacob did so, and completed her week. Then Laban gave him his daughter Rachel to be his wife. 29 (Laban gave his female servant Bilhah to his daughter Rachel to be her servant.) 30 So Jacob went in to Rachel also, and he loved Rachel more than Leah, and served Laban for another seven years.
Prayer: Dear Heavenly Father, thank you for the gift of marriage through which you bring about the companionship of husband and wife, the blessing of children, and encouragement in this sinful world. Despite our sin and weakness, you continue to bless marriages and its beneficiaries through your Holy Word where you give us forgiveness and life. Grant us humility and faith to promote and appreciate these gifts. Amen.
God’s Blesses Marriage Despite Our Sin
Dear Fellow Redeemed,
Love, deception, unlawful marriage, servitude, favoritism and jealousy. The description of Jacob’s life certainly could be used as a description for today’s television soap operas. But this is the history of Jacob, the grandson of Abraham, the son of Isaac. Jacob received his name because when he was born to Isaac and Rebekah, he was one of two twin boys and as his older brother Esau was born, he held on to his heel. Jacob’s name literally means, “heel grabber” or “supplanter.” His name would a fitting descriptor of his own life—for he not only took Esau’s birthright in exchange for a meal, but he also disguised himself as Esau wearing his clothing and putting sheepskin on, so that Isaac would think he was blessing his hairy older son, Esau. You and I would be hard pressed to come up with events more shocking than the ones in Jacob’s life!
As we know from Scripture, Rebekah became aware of Esau’s plot, that after his father died, he wanted to kill Jacob for revenge. So, wanting to save her favorite son and to ensure that he would find a believing wife, Rebekah urges Isaac to send Jacob away. Isaac then told Jacob to go to Padam Aram to find a wife from one of Laban’s daughters, the brother of Rebekah. And this is where our lesson for this morning begins. Jacob had traveled to Haran and met Rebekah, the daughter of Laban, who was tending to her father’s sheep. When Laban heard that one of his relatives had come, he was eager to meet Jacob.
When Laban first meets Jacob, we see what appears to be a joyous family reunion. Laban embraced Jacob and welcomed him to his house. There Jacob explains to Laban who he is and his history, how much of that history, we do not know. Yet, it was enough to lead Laban to proclaim, “Surely you are my bone and my flesh!” and Jacob stayed with him one month. During this time, Jacob showed his usefulness to Laban. Jacob was a hard worker and, as any God-fearing Old Testament believer, he did not wait around to receive a handout but sought to assist and help his uncle Laban. So, when Jacob offered Laban seven years of service in exchange for his daughter, Rachel, which was a very generous dowry, Laban was certainly pleased to accept.
Yet, things begin to get complicated. The very fact that Jacob is the one who must remind Laban of the completion of his contract shows that Laban was not eager to let Jacob, such a useful worker go. Jacob says, “Give me my wife that I may go in to her, for my time is completed.” Jacob already refers to Rachel as his wife, because at this time, an engagement was tantamount to marriage—all that was left was for the consummation of that marriage. So, the wedding feast was prepared, and the guests were gathered. Finally, after seven years, Jacob was to marry Rachel whom he loved.
But then the terrible deception! Instead of bringing his younger daughter Rachel, he brings to Jacob his older daughter Leah! The next morning, Moses records Jacob’s shock, “behold, it was Leah! And Jacob said to Laban, ‘What is this you have done to me? Did I not serve with you for Rachel? Why then have you deceived me?’” Think about the devastation. But how does Laban answer? He gives a lame excuse. He says that in his country, the older must be married first. Laban had seven years to tell this to Jacob, but he did not. And if this really was a common practice, certainly Jacob would have learned about this during his time in Haran. Laban’s true colors come out. His quick bartering to give Rachel to Jacob for another seven years of service shows what Laban was hoping to gain—money.
This account leaves us with many questions. First, how did Jacob not realize that it was Leah and not Rachel? Some Bible commentators suggest that drinking at the wedding feast may have played a part in this deception. It would have also been in the darkness of night when Leah was brought to Jacob’s tent. What’s more, it was also the custom at that time to have the bride heavily veiled. It’s likely that all three of these played a part in Laban’s deception. The other question for us twenty-first century Christians is—was it a sin for Jacob to have two wives? We must affirm that it was. God created marriage to be between one man and one woman, regardless of the popular practices of the day. But we must also recognize that every age has certain sins that they are at times blinded to.
The final question that arises from our lesson is—how did Rachel and Leah feel about all this? We are not told. Certainly, they would have been against such a deception, but at the same time, they were likely convinced by their father and wanted to honor him. But we also learn of the horrible jealousy between Rachel and Leah—a fight that would continue all their lives and continue among their children. Jacob loved Rachel—she was lovely. While Leah had “weak” or “delicate” eyes. Leah did not possess the beauty of Rachel nor the affection of Jacob.
Love, deception, unlawful marriage, servitude, favoritism, jealousy, and IRONY! The one who deceived his father is now deceived. The one whose older brother stood in the way of his birthright and blessing now had the older sister stand in the way of his betrothed wife.
Our lesson is filled with important teachings and lessons, but there are three which would be beneficial for us to discuss. First, our lesson teaches us about the importance of marriage, not only that it is a sacred institution created by God, but even more, that it matters who you marry. Isaac and Rebekah were concerned about who Jacob would marry. Rebekah told Isaac, “If Jacob takes a wife of the daughters of Heth, like these who are the daughters of the land, what good will my life be to me?” They wanted Jacob to have a God-fearing spouse. They wanted someone who would encourage Jacob in his faith rather than someone who would lead him away. As Christians, we should realize the eternal implications picking a spouse can have. Not only for ourselves, but for our children. It matters who you date. It matters who you marry. And who of us doesn’t want a spouse who believes and practices forgiveness? Despite the mishaps and mistakes of the patriarchs, they serve as godly examples to follow when it comes to choosing a spouse.
The second lesson we learn is that because of our sin, we often misuse and abuse God’s gift of marriage. Marriage is one of God’s greatest gifts—it is the fountainhead of all earthly blessings. Man and woman become one flesh, they have companionship and, if God wills, the blessing of children. Yet, since God loves marriage, we also know that it serves as one of the devil’s greatest targets. The devil knows how marriage can be a blessing and environment for raising children in the Christian faith. It’s no wonder that he tries to destroy it by tempting us to selfishness and sin. Just think about how pleased the devil was to cause all this trouble in Jacob’s family.
Today, polygamy is not a common sin in marriage, but that doesn’t mean we lack for other opportunity. Men fail to love their wives as they ought, to sacrifice and serve. Women fail to respect their husbands and encourage them to lead their homes to Christ. We forget to take the log out of our own eye, before taking the speck out of our spouses’. So many marital problems and divorces stem from selfishness. “That’s not my job! They shouldn’t have treated me so! I can’t forgive them. I deserve better.” This same selfishness is what spoils so many before marriage—through sins of lust, pornography, and premarital sex. What you think will bring temporary satisfaction, only brings hurt and shame.
This brings us to our third and most important lesson—we have a God of grace and mercy, who loves us and blesses marriage by forgiving us all our sins. The only remedy for sin is repentance and forgiveness. That is what we all desperately need, whether we are married or not. And that is exactly what God gives us.
God didn’t give up on Jacob’s marriage despite the deception and sin. In fact, God blessed their marriage because God keeps his promises even when we are faithless. It was through Jacob and Leah’s son, Judah, that God would send the Savior. And this Savior came to carry the sins of the whole world to the cross, including the sins in and outside of marriage. He came to purify and wash us clean of every sin, so that we could stand righteous before God and forgiven.
The lives of the patriarchs prove that God is faithful to us not because we have perfectly obeyed him, but because he keeps his promises even when we fall short. When Jacob was on his way to Haran the Lord appeared to him at Bethel (Genesis 28) and promised that through one of his descendants all the families of the earth would be blessed and that he would be with him wherever he goes. And God kept his promises! He sent a Savior who was a descendant of Jacob, and he cared for Jacob all his days!
Maybe there are some sins in your life that are troubling you. You sinned against your spouse. You committed some sexual sin which plagues your conscience. You have guilt about a former divorce or wrecked marriage. Then hear these words of Scripture, “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness” (I John 1:9).
We may have turned our backs to God, but he has not turned away from his promise to you. That is why your baptism is one of the greatest comforts in the world! At your baptism, you were made a child of God. He washed all your sin away. When you confess your sins to God, he washes you again, cleansing you from your sin, and covering you with his perfect righteousness so that you can be his child now and forever.
You can be confident of this forgiveness, because on the cross, your Savior bore the sins of unfaithful and selfish husbands and wives, rebellious children, drunks, addicts, gossipers, and every sexual sin in thought and deed. We can’t fix our sins, but Jesus can. Jesus has. He is our real Savior, who saves us from our very real sins. As Peter wrote, “who Himself bore our sins in His own body on the tree, that we, having died to sins, might live for righteousness—by whose stripes you were healed” (I Peter 2:24).
The recipe for a perfect family or marriage isn’t that we do everything right. As sinners, this is impossible. The recipe for a successful wedding day, marriage, and life, is to have Christ present. Our Savior gives us the right to start each day anew, forgiving our sins and the sins of others. May the lives of the patriarchs remind us of God’s faithfulness amid our foolishness and joy that despite our sin, God blesses us and our marriages. Amen.